First of all, I’m sorry that my reflection is so late, finals are coming up two weeks early this year so I’ve been “running around like a headless chicken” (a saying my dad uses all the time, I finally understand it now. Haha.)
I have always believed that the Catholic faith was not built on grand ceremonies or traditional prayers, but on the life changing relationships that we discover along the way on our journeys with people who have a deep love for Christ and a deep desire to follow in His mission to serve. For me growing up, the defining moment in the development of my spirituality was building relationships with all of the Anh Chi at SEED Retreat. I remember a distinct moment during my first SEED retreat as I watched our leaders be so enthusiastic about a theme song that it was almost embarrassing. I thought, “Look. Here’s a bunch of really cool people who are so excited about being Catholic that they don’t mind looking silly, don’t mind putting the rest of their lives on hold to be with us here. Well if they’re so into it, there must be something great about being Catholic.” And they were right. I came out of that retreat feeling, for the first time, that I belonged to something great, that I belonged to the Church, that I belonged to Christ. For the first time in my life I was saying prayers that weren’t written for me. Thinking about God in ways that no one had ever told me to do before. Feeling things for God that I was not taught to feel. I was experiencing a personal encounter with Love. It was such an empowering feeling I felt like I had to tell everyone I knew and share it with them – I later realized this was my first quiet call to service.
I must confess that I went into Summit distracted, I was caught up in helping with the program, coordinating rides and places to sleep, and generally worrying about how the interaction dynamics between different groups were going to play out. What if we can’t connect with the Midwest and Northeast? What if the organizers don’t understand what we’re doing? What if we get stuck on the politics and mechanics of things and lose sight of where God’s spirit is trying to lead us? What if we all go home with despair over the future of SEED? As usual however, I was pleasantly surprised by the ways that God works. I found that even on the very first night everyone was present with open minds and hearts and it didn't matter that we were all from different places and age groups. We were united in our passion to serve the youth and that passion brought us to accomplish some great things during Summit. I was especially touched by the sharings from the parents and organizers during many of our small group reflections as they shared about how much they loved their children and how much support they bring to the table to empower us leaders to do the retreats.
I could see God in everyone there and I felt so blessed to share some time with them, and I realized that my initial doubts and worries were just like the doubts and worries that we SEED leaders going into each retreat with. What if we can’t connect with the kids? What if we don’t get along with their parents? What if the kids don't understand what we’re trying to share? What if we somehow send them home with less faith in God than before? But we have to remind ourselves that we can bring 100% of our heart and efforts but it’s not our show, its God’s, we only set the table for the dinner between each child and their God. We trust that He will move mountains one SEED, one child’s heart at a time. And it seems to work, He’s a great dinner host – I think we all experienced that during SEED Summit too. We each brought our gifts to the table to share with each other, with open minds and hearts, and with a hunger and thirst to be Christ’s hands and feet to serve the children. God brought the main course and I know that I for one, left Summit filled with His grace, strength, and love – ready to share with everyone I encounter.
Bethany Thao Vy
Posts
No comments:
Post a Comment